“You’re Doing It; You’re Winning”

“You’re doing it; You’re winning.” With every small shuffle each foot made, he cheered me on.  I was unable to sit and walk without assistance. He helped me in & out of bed and carried me to the restroom all day. He never once complained. I do not deserve someone as wonderful and dedicated as my husband, but God brought us together 24 years ago and I am humbled at this gift He has given me.

I cried a lot on Sunday, for many reasons.  Some because I missed doing the “normal” Mother’s Day routine of church and lunch with my kids, some because I couldn’t even stay awake to spend time with them or converse with my own mother, but mostly I cried because I was embarrassed and ashamed of needing that level of care.  I have always been independent and when you have to rely on someone else to help you sit, walk and go to the restroom it is very difficult and honestly, plain old sad. My heart broke for my husband with each and every shuffle I made and I cried.

I’m glad to say after spending two days in bed and one day sitting in a chair, I was able to get out of the house today.  I had a visit with my parents and took my kids to the mall and dinner.  Of course I’m exhausted now, but it was worth it to get out and spend time with the people I love.

The good news is God was gracious and answered my prayers for helping my daughter get ready for prom on Saturday.  I was able to do her makeup and watch as my sister curled her hair.  I was even able to take the pictures. She was absolutely beautiful and her date was handsome.

The end of this week brings a consultation with one of the surgeons.  I have many questions and hope to get some answers.  Please pray for me as I try to figure out a surgery plan that is right for me.  I still have not made a decision and I really need to hear God on this one.  I feel a bit desperate, but I know God will show me the right path at the right time.  I am also praying for a good weekend as we attend a band banquet/awards dinner and celebrate my daughter’s 17th birthday.  It’s a bit tricky for me to get rest with a busy schedule, but I’m praying my strength will return and I will be able to spend time with my family.


  1. Nancy says:

    You are doing it day by day and you are getting stronger. His grace is enough It will carry you through your darkest moments. You are a strong women of faith. Even though your laughter is quiet there is still joy bubbling in your spirit that shines through. You are a blessed women to have such strong family support and how amazing to see you work out for the world to see “For better or for worse, in sickness and in health.” You are blessed to have Rick but he is also blessed to have you. Continuing to pray for you. You are amazing!

  2. Christi says:

    It takes a strong woman to admit that she needs help sometimes, and to receive it gracefully helps you heal. I’m sure Rick would say that he is the one who is blessed to be the man you lean on when the weight of all this becomes too heavy.
    Praying for continuing disappearance of your cancer and for the answers you need for the next step in your cure.

  3. Susan Fowler on Facebook says:

    I know how hard the days are after chemo and glad you’re feeling better. You are so strong and never should you feel bad for needing help. That’s what our loved ones are there for. I know the decisions to come will be hard but you’ll choose the right thing for you. if you need to talk to anyone that’s been there, i went through this with my sister last year and we could tell you her chices and why. Stay strong!

  4. gladel says:

    I did good job in raising Rick .I am glad you love him and he chose you for life.Keep the faith and God will show the way to the end of this journey.
    Enjoyed our time together yesterday.

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